A helpful thought — “It was always meant to happen this way”

I’m unsure whether I should write about this. I found out today that my Dad’s cancer has spread to his spine.

I’m trying to remember that the pain I feel about this comes from my thoughts about the circumstance, not the circumstance itself.

My thoughts jump ahead to imagining what it will be like for him to go through the treatment, imagining what it will be like if the treatment doesn’t work, imagining how my mom will handle all of this, wishing this hadn’t happened.

And that’s alright–it’s what our minds do and it’s perfectly natural that I would have these and similar thoughts.

The first step is not fighting against what is. I’ve got some painful thoughts that I’m having trouble replacing–that’s alright.

I’ll get there.

For now I’m remembering “It was always meant to happen this way”. And that helps.

So does keeping this writing commitment.