I was just doing a search on someone who is somewhat well-known on the web, and I came across a really negative post about them.
It’s fascinating to me that as I read the author’s criticisms of this person, I found myself feeling negatively about the author.
Then I remembered this thing I learned from Byron Katie—that whenever we’re judging someone else, in that moment–we are usually doing the same thing we are judging them for.
The author was pointing out the big ego of the person they were writing about. But the only part of us that can recognize the ego in another is the ego in us. It’s that whole (sometimes annoying to remember) you-spot-it-you-got-it thing. So the author was judging the person they were writing about for having a big ego with their (the author’s) big ego –in that moment.
And I was judging the author for being so critical of the person I was looking up. So, in my mind at that moment, I was criticizing the author for criticizing.
Hilarious. And very helpful to notice.
We want them to stop judging, stop criticizing, but it always starts with us.
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